Welcome to a very special edition of Cherry-flavored Pez.

Wow, that sounds a lot like “And tonight, a very special episode of Blossom.” I promise, though, that Dudley and I aren’t going to take our shirts off for the friendly bicycle repairman. If you think this episode stinks, you’re probably right. It’s way too long and way too boring. I should have used a script. I will in the future, I promise.

Notes for the show:

• This episode is 46 minutes and 12 seconds long. If you drop out after the first ten minutes, I don’t blame you. If you hang on to the very end, you deserve an award.
• You can buy Clannad’s “Theme from Harry’s Game” from Amazon
• This episode is 55,443,437 bytes in size. If you were using these old 90mm/3.5″/1.44 MB disks, it would take 37 of them to hold this podcast, assuming that you could find a program that was capable of handling files that large and breaking them into large pieces. If you were using a Mac, you could probably use Disk Utility.

• I really don’t have a problem with old people. Just today, after I walked four blocks behind an old couple who were traveling at the speed of ants, they stepped aside and let me pass, so that I could walk the last twenty feet of my journey at my own pace. You just don’t see courtesy like that anymore.
• You can buy David Sedaris’s Live at Carnegie Hall here.
• I was seriously tempted to do this as an .m4a file, so I could include chapter markers that would take you to specific days, but the file size would have become unmanageable. Instead, here are the time markers:
  • Sunday starts at 3:30
  • Monday starts at 4:17
  • Tuesday starts at 7:18
  • Wednesday starts at 8:33
  • Thursday starts at 19:58
  • Friday starts at 26:13
  • Saturday starts at 38:05
• Can you hear me now?
• Read White Whine and suffer for my personal amusement.
• You can read about how/when/where/why/how [anonymous student] gave me a laptop here. And again, thanks [anonymous student].

• • Seriously, though, if you still have a bunch of those old 90mm floppies around (and I just realized the innuendo involved in writing “90mm floppy”), you can do something like this with them:I still haven’t quite figured out how they did this, but I don’t care. This image is pretty much proof that I wasted the entire 90’s.

• You can read the entire text of David Sedaris’s wonderful story “Six to Eight Black Men” at the Esquire website.
• You can’t really hear my other computer restart, but you can hear the fan on my Mac Mini throughout the entire podcast.
• You can buy pretty much every book that David Sedaris has ever written on Amazon.
• For the most part, I did talk a lot slower in this podcast, which perhaps explains its size.
• But seriously, you don’t want to be around me when my blood sugar gets low.
• As promised, here’s a link to the old car festival in 2008 and another gallery from 2009. I still have to add a gallery for the 2011 pics, and when I do, I’ll include a link here.

You are welcome to comment, but remember to be nice—that guy in Poland is listening.

As always, enjoy.

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.